Rough Morning
Can anything else go wrong?
Ever had one of those mornings where even the coffee seems to be plotting against you? Picture this: I wake up feeling like I've been hit by a truck, and hobble over to the coffee maker. I go through the motions of brewing my morning elixir, only to realize I forgot the most crucial step: actually putting the cup under the Keurig. Result? A glorious waterfall of caffeine cascading down the counter. And just when I think it can't get any worse, I manage to spill the milk too. At this point, I'm seriously considering going back to bed and starting the day over. But then I notice something feels off—oh, right, my sweater's on backward. Classic. But hey, instead of letting these mishaps ruin my day, I decided to take a breather, read my devotion, and take some time to reflect and process.
What happened? Honestly, I found myself in a whirlwind of emotions, overwhelmed at a chaotic mix of goals, setbacks, tasks, and challenges. In this frenzy, I was merely going through the motions, avoiding being present. With all the mishaps, it became apparent that I needed to pause, to decelerate, and untangle the clutter within my mind. Achieving emotional balance became important. If not I risk letting the circumstances or challenges affect how I will treat others.
Four principles have helped me find balance. Firstly, I learned the importance of pausing to delve into my emotions. Why was I so distracted while making coffee? Instead of rushing, I discovered the power of understanding my feelings, which brings clarity and self-awareness. As silly as it may seem in the context of my coffee mishap, the reality is that at that moment, I was facing a decision with less than desirable outcomes.
Second step, I reflect on the story I've been telling myself. Many of our struggles stem from our thought patterns, so I'm cautious of negative narratives, assumptions, or perceptions. By monitoring my mindset, I minimize the chance of making decisions based on false perceptions that can reap negative consequences. So what narrative was I telling myself? The negative narrative I constructed revolved around the belief that the less desirable outcomes would stand in the way of my projects and slow me down.
Third step, I monitor myself and my conduct towards others. Am I expressing impatience with loved ones or colleagues? Do I manifest frustration through sighs or curt responses? Thinking about these actions makes me analyze myself, encouraging me to revisit my emotional path and find out what causes them. So how did I treat others in response to my coffee mishap? Luckily no one was around, but I could feel irritation creeping in. If I had not gone through this process, I might have ended up projecting that irritation onto others.
Lastly, I pay attention to how others interact with me. Do they avoid me? This observation gives me valuable clues about my emotional state. Are they pulling away or reflecting my tension? These insights guide my quest for emotional balance. Thankfully, when I had my coffee mishap, no one was there to see it, so I controlled my irritation before it escalated. But if I hadn't, others might have sensed my tension and irritation, possibly reacting with negative body language, tone, or avoiding me entirely.
This model, F.A.C.E., has been my northstar, guiding me to recognize my current emotional state and restoring balance when needed. Without it, I find myself reacting to simple errors like forgetting to place the coffee mug in the Keurig.
The F.A.C.E. model, taught in our GROWTH class, has resonated with diverse audiences, from staff, families, directors, couples, and parents alike. For those interested in delving deeper into this transformative framework, feel free to connect with us at omaira@familybridgesusa.org or alicia@familybridgesusa.org. You can also check out a sample of our GROWTH class by clicking here.
Reflection questions:
- Have you ever experienced a morning like the one described? How did you handle it?
- Which of the four lessons resonated with you the most, and why?
- How do you usually react when you're feeling overwhelmed or stressed?